Tuesday, June 27, 2006

Snark, Snark, Snark

Normally I do not give two shits what celebrities do. In general, as far as I am concerned they can pretty much do and say whatever they want as long as it's legal. That said I was basically struck dumb by the following photo. WHAT was she thinking? She looks like Rudolph Valentino.

Photo by: Gianmarco Maggiolini

Photo taken from: http://www.garbospeaks.com/Valentino/

Thursday, June 22, 2006

What I learned on Saturday

When you buy two new cell phones WITH CAMERAS and you attend a professional sporting event, do NOT leave both phones in the car. We did not leave the phones in the car by accident. It was very purposeful and even was discussed as we left the car. Of course, while standing in line for the ATM I saw someone who looked just like someone I used to work with. She was known fondly as "The Troll." If I had the camera I would have snapped her picture so former co-workers and I could have figured out if it was really her. Then the Phillie Phanatic came out in the 5th inning with a HOT DOG CANNON. He was shooting wrapped hot dogs into the stands. The best part was when one blew up all over the field just behind first base.

It sucks to be a grownup sometimes

Recently The Wife and I got new cell phones. I decided that I wanted a new ring tone. I was looking through the available tones and came up with 2 that I would love to have - The Lumberjack Song from Monty Python and a Beavis and Butthead bit. I, of course, did not buy either one because I decided that the first time I forget to put my phone on vibrate during a client meeting, someone will call and my phone will start screaming "I AM CORNHOLIO. I NEED TP FOR MY BUNGHOLE." I am sad that I care. It makes me old.

Monday, June 12, 2006

The dog is a complete spaz

I received the note below from The Wife the other day. We are trying to teach our dog to be less hyper when walking anywhere but our backyard so The Wife took the poochie to a lake near our house for a little stroll. I'm not sure why I found this so amusing but I did. Probably because I have seen what an "interested" pooch looks and sounds like. Quite indescribable.

We have returned from our walk at the Lake. Pooch is asleep on the cool floor here in the kitchen. We walked an (as of yet) undetermined distance with relatively few difficulties.

Difficulty 1: Forgot to bring baggies so when she had her horse-sized doot, I was forced to dump her treats into my shorts' pocket and use that baggie.
Difficulty 1a: There are no trash cans along the path - just at the parking lots, so had to carry the baggie of horse-sized doot for the remainder of the walk.
Difficulty 2: 4 VERY LARGE SWANS. Needless to say Pooch was extremely interested.
Difficulty 3: Lots of people walking & running - and many of them had baby strollers - extra interest for that.
Plus #1: She's NOT interested in people on bicycles.
Plus #2: She only pulled for difficulties 2 & 3 - the rest of the time, she was very, very, very good on the leash.
Plus #3: She only stopped to lay down & rest once.

Monday, June 05, 2006

I'm sorry, Brady Bear

Last Monday the wife and I adopted an 18-month old male miniature poodle to be a companion to our nearly 4-year old female miniature poodle. Yesterday, we returned him to his breeder. He was basically still a puppy, albeit one with a few bad habits already. However, he was settling in to our house and was a furry love bug. The problem turned out to be our existing poodle. She got more agressive with him as the days went by. We had to keep them separated inside and if either one was loose in the house we had to supervise them to keep them away from each other's crates. We also had to closely supervise their time together outside. We had our trainer in on Saturday and she got to see a dog fight. She gave us some techniques and recommended a book called "On talking terms with dogs: Calming signals". The whole process was absolutely exhausting and we were keeping both dogs crated far more than we were comfortable with. Finally yesterday we made the decision that for the well-being of the household, we should return the fuzzy boy to his breeder. She accepted him gracefully and said that if our female had not accepted him already she probably wasn't going to. I feel like such a failure. I feel like I should have been able to make it work and create a "peaceable kingdom". I feel like we failed in training our first dog and made it so she couldn't accept another dog but she is otherwise a good dog. Spastic in her greetings (according to our trainer she was just born that way, not that we can't make it more socially acceptable) but otherwise a good dog.

I want to save every dog that doesn't have a good home but I can't do that. The whole situation just makes me cry.

Bear, I hope you find a forever family all of your own who can give you all the love, treats, and training you deserve.